The First Thing Morton Notices About San Diego....

Morton thinks it means, "Careful, someone might want a piece of your hat!"

Morton Is Still Very Tired From His Vacation, But He Promises To Show Everybody His Pictures, Starting Tomorrow

Morton Meets A Whale

Today, Morton went to where Shamu the whale lives. They call it Sea World, but it has horses (and not just sea horses). This is because they are beer horses and Sea World is really Beer World, but that's okay. Morton fed fish to sea lions and crumbly cookies to pink birds and lettuce to turtles. Nobody thanked Morton.

Then Morton saw many ninjas and a man with a plastic gun dressed in pink armour. It was almost like Morton's birthday, except for there were more ninjas.

Morton has tried four flavours of ice cream made by his new best friends, Ben and Jerry. Morton tried one with chocolate and marshmallows, and one called Cinammon Bun, and one with coffee and Chunky Monkey, which has no monkeys in it, which Morton already knew.

Tomorrow, Morton is going home. Morton wants to sleep now.

Morton On The Go

Today, Morton was on two sailing ships, a steamship, a submarine and an aircraft carrier. The sailing ship was the best smelling. Then Morton sat in the sunshine until his fur was toasty warm. Then Morton thought about toast.

Morton saw Klingons today and blue people and green people. Morton saw storm troopers and cylons. The cylons go mree mree mree mree mree mree mree mree.

Tomorrow, Morton is going to Sea World to see turtles. Morton is going to try and kiss one on the nose, if they let him. Why don't people want to let Morton love?

Morton On The Move

Morton is in San Diego, which Morton believes is Spanish for "Sandy Eggo." Morton loves being in a place named after waffles. Tomorrow Morton is going to climb a palm tree and go on a ship called The Surprise. And maybe climb The Surprise too (SURPRISE!)

Morton has seen a Storm Trooper and a Chewbacca made out of Lego, but he hasn't seen Stormtrooper Elvis yet. But Morton did see Lou Ferrigno, who used to be green and Hulky, limping down the street and Morton just wanted to hug him and hug him, because he looked so tired and sad.

Now Morton is going to eat fish tacos and go to sleep.

Morton Gets Lost In Transition

Just one more chapter, then Morton will go to bed.

Morton Becomes Alarmed

Oh no! That means that (deleted) is really (deleted) and now Harry has to (deleted) or else everyone will be (deleted).

Morton Makes A Discovery

Voldemort is a big meanie!

Morton Lays Out His Plan For A Perfect Day

All Morton needs now is root beer and ice cream!

Despite Hours of Effort, Morton Remains Unclear On The Concept

But if this is the wrong way, how did Morton get here?

Morton Wants One Of These Too!

For when Morton gets out of the shower.

By The Time Morton Got Through With The Evil Giant Robot, This Was All That Was Left

Morton gave him a supermonkeyhug and crumpled him up into a ball!

Maybe The "Doctor Who" Marathon Wasn't Such A Good Idea After All

Take that, you stupid Dalek poophead!

Morton Is Stuck Inside Because Of The Stupid Rain, So He's Spending The Day Dreaming Of The Future

One day, Morton will meet Stormtrooper Elvis and Stormtrooper Elvis will reveal Morton's destiny!

Jump, Mighty Frog Warriors, Jump!

T.G.I.M.

M is for Monkey!

After Many Bloodcurdling Adventures, Morton Returns To The Secret Valley Of The Lost Monkey

Morton can see his house from here!

Oh, Morton. Not Again.

Morton needs to burp really really bad.

Dr. Morton Is Much Nicer Than That Big Meanie on "House"

Patient shows signs of skinnedkneebooboo-itis and requires 50cc's of kissitbetter, stat!

The Classic "Monkey's Journey To The West" As Performed By Morton

Okay, everybody, let's go!

Morton Takes His Fun A Step Too Far

Morton's tummy feels funny.

Monkeycam Highlights From Morton's Trip To Springfield

Completely By Accident, Morton Slips Into An Alternate Reality

Ay Caramba!

Morton Could Do This Too, If He Wanted

Morton Isn't Much For Waiting

Did anyone send Morton candy today? Hello? Anyone?

Morton Builds A Better Future For Us All

It's the merry-go-round of tomorrow!

In The End, This Was The Only Picture Taken Of The Lone Monkey That Saved The Earth

Hold on, little space aliens! Morton is coming to kiss you all!

Just In Time, The Love Monkey Marines Come Ashore

See? Morton isn't the only aquamonkey after all!

His Conquest Of The Surface World Complete, Aquamonkey Relaxes In His Royal Aqua-Grotto

That was easy!

Aquamonkey Personally Leads The Conquest Of The Surface World

Climb, my fishy minions, climb!

Aquamonkey Uses His Telepathic Powers To Summon His Mighty Undersea Minions

Heed Morton's commands and bring Morton peppermints and licorice!